YEAR IN REVIEW : 2015

YEAR IN REVIEW : 2015


It has been a hot minute since I even wrote anything down here, I forgot how therapeutic it is to just sit with a tea and compile all the thoughts that go on in my head, so here we go!

When I look back at 2015 I think "wow I feel like I accomplished absolutely nothing I set out to." However, looking closer (and not being so hard on myself) I saw that 2015 Kayla saw a LOT of changes - both good and bad. 

Last year around this time I wrote out a huge goal list of all the things I wanted to do or set out to accomplish, when I look at my life then and my life now, part of me feels like I am in the exact same place, but I know I'm not - if that even makes sense? I found the post and I'm going to summarize if I met the goal and/or where I am not with the goal.

01. Graduate with honours: This was accomplished! It was really important to me, and I really made school my full time job. Happy and a bit sad that this huge part of my life is over, but I am moving on up!

02. Find a job: I was hired right out of school so that was a big stress relief! I worked with the United Way for a little bit and more recently transitioned to working for a hospital and it has been absolutely amazing! I think I found my forever job :)

03. Start a family: This is probably one of the hardest things to accept - the fact that this goal that I wanted so badly did not happen. However, as of right now in my life I realized that I am content. Content with where I am and who I am, and that makes me so happy. I struggled so much all year with this, and now I can happily say I am calm and accepting to whatever may come in this realm of my life.

04. Be more organized: I will always be good when it comes to organizing, I have a planner that comes everywhere with me, we are best friends! 

05. Health, Health, Health: Ah the health resolution, 2015 I was probably the heaviest I have ever been - but since August I have lost almost 20 lbs bringing me back to where I was when I got married. Although I would LOVE to take all credit, I have to give props to my OBGYN, he is amazing and has been so patient with me. 

06. Make time: Something I think I will always struggle with. I wish I could make more time to go home and visit my family, I wish all the schedules with my friends aligned and I could see them. However, life is not like that - I love them all, and they all know that. I think I made a good effort and also made the time for myself - because self care is always key!

07. Do more photography: Kyle and I both came to the conclusion that it was best for us to take a bit of a break and really refresh our style and editing. We did a few projects for friends, but our photography definitely took a back seat this year. 

This year I decided to not write any kind of goals for the year - I still have monthly goals because I feel it is important to aspire to different things but I think it will be interesting to just see how the year plays out. I am in such an amazing place emotionally, spiritually, and physically which is a first in a long time. So part of me just does not feel like putting expectations for myself for such a long period of time - 2015 I was definitely extremely hard on myself whether it was regarding fertility, school, finding a job, whatever it may have been. So 2016 I want to focus on just enjoying moments as they come - try new things and be open to the challenges and opportunities that arise.

I hope I have the time to sit down before December 2016 to actually write again, I do miss documenting things that happen or the thoughts I have at different times in my life. I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year with all of your loved ones! 

xo
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CURRENTLY : LONG WEEKEND EDITION

CURRENTLY : LONG WEEKEND EDITION


It has been a while since I have done one of these, it is always nice to look back and see what I was up to, and these are always nice when I do not really have anything productive to write about, but still want to post something! 

Dreaming : Of our trip! It is the first time Kyle and I will be able to go somewhere together, and I have never been to New York before, so I am excited!

 Planning : Our trip to NYC in September for our one year wedding anniversary and my friend's maternity shoot next weekend!

 Making : Some DIY's for the maternity shoot as well as knitting (it is my new obsession, ever since finishing school I realized I have a lot more time on my hands and needed something to fill it - the result : knitting everything)

 Watching : Crave tv has finally made it onto our Apple Tv, so I have been catching up on old episodes of Entourage! I never finished the series so I want to make sure I finish it all before the movie comes out in a few weeks!

Listening : Taylor Swift is back on repeat again, I don't care what anyone says - she is amazing!

I hope everyone had a safe and happy long weekend! Back to the grind tomorrow!
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CLOSING A CHAPTER

CLOSING A CHAPTER

Lately, as the last few weeks of the semester means chaos and time crunches, I have been using this time to really soak it all in since this is the last time I will be experiencing this ever.  Truth is, school has been a love/hate kind of thing, in one sense I am addicted to it (my OSAP balance can attest to that) and on the other I'm just over it, it is such a weird feeling to explain. My dad jokes that he literally cannot get me to leave school, and it's true. Today in class we talked about the types of emotions we have all been feeling with our time at Georgian coming to an end, and to be honest I have felt every emotion out there pretty much. 

Going into it, I did not think I would ever be able to see myself in a college setting, but I knew I needed more education to get a better job. Looking back I can see how wrong my thought process was, and accepting my offer here was one of the best things I have ever done for myself. In the two years (HOW HAS IT BEEN THAT LONG! Time flies..) here at Georgian, I have felt more at home then the five years I spent at Lakehead and have learned far more too. Not only that, but I have learned so much more about myself and how I am as a person both to myself and others around me, I have learned to leave behind the relationships that do nothing for me, and work harder at the ones that do. It is truly a bittersweet feeling knowing that on April 17, I will walk into the school at noon to write my Social Psychology exam, and then never have to come back. Every essay I finish brings the realization that I will never be doing this for a class ever again, and I find myself kind of sad at the thought. 

I have met so many amazing people throughout this experience, they are all so different but so kind and have hearts that just want to help people. We have all carried each other through this program in different ways and different times, and I am so grateful to have so many people who were relatively strangers, want to help me out when I needed it. I am anxious and excited to see what my future brings, but I will never forget this experience and the people I have gained in my life because of it. 

I am so proud of all of us who have reached this finish line, and I hope to see everyone at graduation! As for me, I'll be over here finishing my criminology essay and studying for my ethics exam experiencing all the "feels" for the last time. 

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WEEKEND ROUNDUP : PHOTOS

WEEKEND ROUNDUP : PHOTOS

I will never understand how the weekend will always come and go in the blink of an eye. This weekend we did a lot and I thought I would share some photos!



We took our nephews to an indoor trampoline place and they had so much fun! At first I thought booking half an hour would be more than enough time, but it went by so fast and I think next time if we take them I will book an hour for sure! 


I had to go to Value Village for a DIY (next photo) and needed children's books, and while I was there I found these two older books that I fell in love with. They are in amazing condition and I just love how they have a vintage look to them.


This is what I needed the books for! My friend Jessica said they are doing a Lion King themed nursery, and I went and bought block letters and made the initials for her to display where ever she would like in the nursery. I thought it turned out a lot better than I originally thought it would and I can't wait to see the rest of her gift come together! 

I hope everyone else had a great weekend and you're all ready to get back to the grind tomorrow!

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CURRENTLY : FRIDAY EDITION

CURRENTLY : FRIDAY EDITION


Dreaming : of warmer weather! Clocks go forward this Sunday and that means that it starts to get darker later which makes me look forward to the weather getting warmer. We have been lucky this winter that it has not really been that bad, but warmer weather is always nice!

 Planning : my portfolio for graduation, my resume to apply to jobs, and a little hobby/side project (which goes with the photo above). I can't wait to start this, I miss doing DIY's ever since my wedding has been over, and I think this will be really fun :) 

 Making : some super cute DIY decorations for an upcoming party, as well as a few DIY's to add in my friend's baby shower gift which I am so excited about!

 Watching : I have been watching Friends, Suits, and Grey's on Netflix, and on TV I said goodbye to how to get away with murder (it was so intense! and now we have to wait!).

Listening : I have been playing Outlines by Drangonette and Mike Mago on repeat, it has pretty much been the only thing I have been listening to!

Well, that is pretty much the update for this week! Hope everyone has a happy weekend :)

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THIS WEEKS TO-DO

THIS WEEKS TO-DO

Well, this coming week is reading week and even though that's supposed to be code for "spring break," it isn't really a break at all :( I have a to-do list that seems never ending, and about seven weeks to graduation! Here are some of the things I want to tackle this week while I have the spare time:

01. Catch up on placement hours: I am behind 2 days because I came down with that flu everyone had near the end of January. So I am hoping to go in Monday and Tuesday.

02. Finish school work: I have a few assignments, test to study for, and some research to do and I am hoping to carve out some time Wednesday afternoon.

03. Work on my business plan: I am collaborating with someone regarding brand design, and I am hoping this spring to launch a hobby that I have been excited about starting for a while now, fingers crossed everything goes well! 

04. Appointments: I have to take people to appointments, and go to appointments myself! 

05. Work on my resume: I am hoping to finish my portfolio and find a few job postings that I could potentially apply to. Mid-March is when I will be starting to actively apply for jobs, crazy to think I will FINALLY be moving onto the next chapter of my life :) 

I am optimistic that I can keep focused this week and do everything that needs to get done! Hope everyone has a great week ahead!
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6 MONTHS MARRIED

6 MONTHS MARRIED


Kyle and I already are coming up on 6 months married in just a few weeks, and I thought I would take this brief free moment I have to reflect a bit on what these last 6 months have been like. It is hard to believe how fast time comes and goes, the day came and went in the blink of an eye as so many told us it would. In these last 6 months I think we have dealt with more bumps in the road than most couples have, but this has just reassured me that I have found the best partner I could have asked for. 

01. the good : I think these last few months have shown me what it is like to be someone's for sure forever. It is the best feeling coming home to this person and creating a life with them. So far we have made a lot of choices regarding our future, we have bought our first actual vehicle together as a married couple, we have upgraded our home, and we have purchased a new mattress. All seem like small things, but it feels good to be making progress in getting our home to where we want it to be. 

We have also been talking about different ventures together, and creating something great that we can do as a hobby together. We already have our photography business, but in the coming months we have decided to slow down on that and see what else is out there. We loved working with all the people we have and seeing how we can grow a business that started out as just a hobby, but there are so many other things we want to explore. 

The best part of these last 6 months has been who I have shared it with, someone who never fails to make me laugh, and someone who has not left my side in the moments when I needed him most. I can't thank the universe enough for allowing such an amazing soul to enter my life, these next 6 months I'm sure will be just as good. 

02. the bad : Back in December I wrote about my goals for 2015, and in there one of them was to start a family. Something we both still want, but this last month has shown me that right now it is not our time. At the beginning of February I had found out I was pregnant for the second time, and then just two weeks after finding out I miscarried again. I would not wish this process on anyone, and it is something that I am still emotionally trying to overcome. In the coming months my goal is to figure out if everything is okay with my body, and getting my body fully back to normal. Two miscarriages in a row in the span of 3 and a half months has probably put my body into shock, so as of now I am in no rush to start something that is not meant to be at this point in our lives. 

It would be hard on anyone to experience that loss, but for us being newlyweds it hit pretty hard. This was supposed to be a time of celebration, and sometimes it just doesn't work out that way. We both still have our moments, but working through it together is the best thing for us and has made us stronger than ever before. It is interesting to look at wedding pictures because I feel like we had no idea what was coming, but everyone has their journey and I'd like to hope that everything we have gone through in our first six months is leading us somewhere better. 

03. the future? : If we have learned anything these last 6 months it would be that there is nothing you could possibly do to predict or plan the future. Someone who is controlling like myself this is a difficult concept to grasp, but I think for the first time in a while I am at peace with that. 

As of right now, our goal is to get me graduated in April (SO CLOSE!!!) and find a career that I enjoy. Kyle has been really enjoying what he has been doing with his work, and I know he wants to learn more as time goes on. I think this summer will put us in a better place, and I am hoping that by the end of the summer we can go on a trip together to celebrate 1 year of marriage. 

No matter what happens I have to say how happy I am to be married to Kyle, he has shown me a love that I never thought I would be able to experience. Although you don't feel different afterwards, it is a bond that brings us closer together and I am thankful every single day for him (even the days he makes me want to rip my hair out).
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JOURNEY TO HEALTH

JOURNEY TO HEALTH

I have always fluctuated weight, if anyone was to look through my photos there are times where I am bigger and times where I'm smaller. Weight has and always will be one of my biggest issues, but a year ago I decided to embark on a challenge that I had never done before. A friend of mine worked with an online trainer, and while I think the trainer may not have been the right fit for me, I definitely think the tools and strategies I learned along the way have helped a ton. The concept of "eating clean" sounded SO dull and boring, I didn't think I would ever be able to do it. But it was that discipline and restraint that made me as successful as I was. During the three month program, I focused on clean eating and weight training and lost about 25lbs total. The photo above was about 2 months after I had done the program, and probably one of the times I was at my lowest weight other than the year before I moved away to university. I was happy with the changes I had made, I had never worked so hard at something and gotten the results I had. I was able to see what hard work and discipline could do, and was happy to continue having a balanced lifestyle. 

Getting engaged and planning a wedding is stressful at times, and I always knew I wanted to be healthier on my wedding day. I know deep down that I will never be a size two, but I definitely think there is a version of myself that is healthier and that is something I want to work on maintaining forever. I can confidently say that on my wedding day I was happy with the way I looked and the way the photos turned out. That does not mean to say that I think I was at a healthy weight, because I wasn't, but it means that I can look at the photos and be happy with who I was and not cringe or try and pick out everything that is wrong with myself. It may not be what others think is good, but another thing I have learned is to not let the influence of others affect how I feel.

After the wedding, I let things slip a bit, I figured "hey, I don't have to fit into a dress anymore so who cares!" And looking back I regret thinking that way, because then we received news that we were pregnant and I did not want to be pregnant at the weight I was. Unfortunately, 4 weeks after I miscarried, and I was extremely upset and in one of the loneliest places I had been emotionally. When I get stressed or upset, I tend to turn to food and that is exactly what happened. So here I am, 4 months married, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and a lot of chaos later and I have gained probably 10lbs. For someone who has insulin resistance and hormonal imbalances, this is not the place I want to be in. 

So why write this entry? I think accountability is a main drive for myself, the last time I had a community of people watching and wanting updates which made me not want to fail. I could say in my head over and over again okay today is the day, but there is no one to hold me accountable for that. By writing this I feel the drive and motivation to live the lifestyle I want to be the healthiest I can be. I took a meal plan that was a little dry and boring, and pushed myself to get creative. I love chicken but eating it plain every night is not what I wanted to do for three months. So I researched and had recipes approved by the trainer, recipes I still eat for dinner every once and a while because I love them so much. 

So here we go again, the love/hate relationship I have with my health will no longer be an issue. I do not want to have a restricted lifestyle but I definitely want to go back to eating mainly clean and healthy food. 

It is such a cliche, but 2015 I want to be the year of good health, because we want to start a family at some point again this year, and I want to make sure I am in the best health when I do!

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GOTTA HAVE IT: APPS

GOTTA HAVE IT: APPS


I think for the most part it is pretty much expected that we all have our phones in our hands at all times. I am one of those people who pretty much keep the essentials on my phone because I don't want it getting slow or having to search for the things I really want. Today I thought I would share my top 5 favourite iPhone apps and why I love them so much. 

01. Cuptakes: I am a sucker for anything girly when it comes to decking out my iPhone. For .99 cents I got this app a while ago and have been obsessed ever since. They have such a wide selection of wallpapers for your phone, and they add new ones every day so you have tons to choose from!

02. Instagram: This is a given, anyone who follows me knows I am a HUGE sucker for Instagram. It's free and it involves pictures (I love photography), what more could you ask for? I don't think I have used their filters in months though, I use a few other apps to edit my photos before I post them. If you are curious that will probably be a future post.

03. Clue: I wrote about this briefly in a monthly favourites post a while ago. This app helped huge for me, it is a cycle tracker pretty much. For someone like me who has irregular cycles, this adjusts every time you input data. It is the most specific and user friendly one I have found and I definitely recommend it to anyone who would want to use something like this. 

04. Timehop: For someone who is active on social media, it is interesting to see what you've said in the past on that specific day. Timehop is for that purpose, showing you what you were chatting about on that day. Today for instance, 2 years ago Sara announced she was pregnant with our nephew Weston (how it has already been 2 years blows my mind). It is something I find myself opening every morning before I crawl out of bed.

05. Pinterest: There is so much inspiration that is hiding in Pinterest. If I am ever board I always scroll through and can easily get lost. Before bed I often leave a few minutes to wind down and just find things that I like or things that inspire me. I have been a huge fan of Pinterest for years, it is the perfect way to organize and keep anything you could think of.

I think these apps are amazing, and could not live without them! 

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FRIDAY, FINALLY

FRIDAY, FINALLY

You are looking at my very first font creation! I invested in a typography app, and have been consumed in creating and testing it out. I thought this quote was fitting, especially for me. More often then not, I spend most of my time talking myself out of something that I am potentially really passionate about. This comes from the fear inside thinking it won't work out, so why try? But, I hope that as I continue to work on myself, this will slowly go away. 

Once again, it is Friday! Monday I go back to school and finish my last semester. This Christmas break was so relaxing and much needed! It has been the most time I have had off since I started school last January. This weekend there isn't much on the checklist, but I thought I'd share my to-do list this upcoming weekend:

01. Pack the bag: I want to make sure the trusty backpack is ready for Wednesday's classes, which also means clearing out everything that was in there from last semester.

02. Find Placement outfits: It is important to me to make a good impression, especially when it is my placement at a potential future job. I tend to sleep in a lot, so I want to make sure I am prepared in case I run late!

03. Have a date night: Before Kyle and I go back to the hustle of our life, I would love to be able to get a date night in. 

I hope you all have a great weekend! Stay warm, we are supposed to be getting a large amount of snow :/ 
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2015 BLOG GOALS

2015 BLOG GOALS


I posted a few weeks ago about my personal goals and resolutions for this new year, but I thought I would discuss my blog goals for 2015. It is no secret that this little piece of the internet has housed my views and experiences in this world so far, and I would like to continue writing and documenting my life, especially as a newlywed. So with that being said, onto some blog related goals I hope to accomplish this year:

01. Improve photos: I want to start staging photos and incorporating them into my blog. By doing so I hope that it adds a more visually appealing aspect to the content I write about. Photography is already such a large part of my life, so I hope to have both my blog and photography crossover.

02. Create fonts: I have an app on my iPad that allows for typography and creating fonts, this can help with the "branding" aspect, and what I want it to look like. 

03. Change the layout: I would like to get better with HTML and improve the layout of the entire blog, making it a bit more user friendly, easy to navigate, and crisp & modern. I was such a pro in high school at HTML, so I would like to go back to my roots and really experiment.

04. Write more: Ideally, it would be nice to write at least 2 posts every week. I have averaged about 7 posts a month, and I want to make sure I am writing quality things, as opposed to just writing for the sake of writing!

05. Buy a domain: I would like to make the jump and purchase a domain, and get rid of the .blogspot in my website.

06. Learn photoshop: This is important to add photos and a visual touch to my posts. Something I used to be really familiar with in high school, like HTML, it is something I would like to get back into and become better at.

This whole thing feels like such a labour of love, and has been an amazing outlet for myself. Being able to write posts about what I have learned or what I have created is so nice to look back on as the years go on. Happy 2015 lovelies! Cheers to being "goal diggers" ;)

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